It's A Bit Cold Out

Winter is upon us. It didn't get above 40 today :( I don't mind too much because winter means snow. The part I do mind is that it was in the 60s when we got back home on Sunday and yesterday was warm too. Now it's not. I was spoiled last week by my grandparents incredibly warm stove. Now I'm back to my 68 degree house and have cold hands and feet. Anyone want to cuddle?

Nerves

Sometimes, I wonder why I get so nervous around guys. It even happens with guys I've known for a bit. Put me in a room with just me and him though and I start to say stupid stuff or nothing at all. I'm sure that probably changes guys opinions on me. Just hang with me for a bit though... It gets better. Lol.
It's a crazy busy week so I prob won't post much.

Beautiful Virginia

Good morning!
I'm in Virginia now. We got here yesterday evening. Honestly I'm sick of being in a car but we rarely do this anymore so I'm making the best of it. The views of the country side alone make it worth it. Oh how I've missed the east coast. Back home we don't have anything that is as old as what we have here. For example, Culpeper court was founded in the late 1700's. I wish we were here longer so I would have the chance to visit some of my favorite battlefields and scenic views. Not to worry though, just the views overlooking the field and woods will tide me over for now. I'll post a pic when I get back home.

An Adventure

It's Saturday morning and we're currently resting in the truck at a rest area. The fog is getting thicker and everyone is sleeping but me. I've always had a hard time sleeping in a car but cram me in the back seat and stop the truck and there is no way I'm even trying. My legs are asleep and my butt is numb but once we start going again we only have about 2 hours left. We didn't stop for the night in St. Louis. We did have an adventure though. About 100 miles into the trip the drivers side tire on the car dolley blew out. And I mean it blew out. Hey guess what... The spare was flat. We unhitched the dolley and went off to find some air. Then we had to back track almost 10 miles to finally get to a ramp to turn back around. We get back to the car and dad can't get it up enough to get the jack under it. So we had to hitch it back up and go from there. The whole ordeal set us back about 2 hours and left us with no spare tire.
Thankfully we were all able to joke about it all later in the night.
Oh and guess what... I even drove the truck pulling the dolley and car at some point on this trip. :) Just another thing I can add to my driving accomplishments. Lol

Thanksgiving Vacation

Today is the day. My vacation finally starts. In under an hour we should be on our way North. As a northerner, I'm so freaking excited!! I probably won't post much. No wifi at my grandparents in Virginia.
Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!!

Moving On

Yesterday I took another step towards moving on. I needed to do it a long time ago but couldn't let go. To some it may seem small, but you have to remember that it was a long distance relationship. Pictures were a big part of it all. Anyway, I deleted all but 2 pictures I had on my phone of him. Sure I will probably always care for and have feelings for him but they won't be the same or a's strong. I'm excited for the next step in my life. For my next relationship. I've learned a lot over the last 4 years. I've grown a lot over that time too. I know what I want with my life now and this time it is realistic... I think.

Spring Break on the Mind

Dearest friends,
I have decided that I want to go somewhere for spring break. I was thinking of somewhere on the east coast but probably not a crowded Florida beach. I'd love to go to D.C. But I'm sure no one else will want to spend a week in there. If anyone wants to join me and has ideas I'm totally open to anywhere. :). Let me know!!
Love Always,
Sami

Stress, Work, and Vacation

I am so ready for vacation. I'm sick of work and sick of school. When I get back I am seriously looking for a new job. Last night I had a dream that I got fired because I lost it. I can have a temper at times and I'm so sick of bullshit and drama. Well a customer was asking retarded questions on the phone and I was getting annoyed so I started yelling at them and through the phone. Um... Ya that can't happen in real life and if I'm dreaming about work causing me stress then it's obviously causing me too much stress in real life.
Stress is something I need to learn to control better. I'm 20 and have the stress of a person with a professional job and family to support. At this rate I won't live long enough to have those things. So my New Years goal (yes I know it's early) is going to cut my stress level by t least half. Haha let's see how long that lasts though.

Dancing

In Honor of my dancing last night. lol

Farm Girl

Today's song is....

Farm Girl by Joanna Smith.
To be 100% honest I feel like this song describes how I was when I was younger. I truly was a farm girl. Hell, I'd never lived in a subdivision until I moved down here. I bottle fed calves, rode 4-wheelers, was in 4-H, counted cows, collected eggs, and everything else you can think of. I've become kind of citified since I moved to Arkansas (pretty funny since I always though AR was just farms). Well, I get to go back and spend a week on the farms next week and I couldn't be more excited. It's time for some tractors, dirt, and fishin'!!

http://youtu.be/_HmUUPT3-0g

Been A Long Time

So I've been slacking again with my blog. Sorry all. I can't even promise that I'll do better. I doubt that I'll post while on vacation next week. I'll try to get a good one up before I leave though. Maybe something deep. I don't know though. We'll have to see what comes to mind whenever I do it. :)
I've had the best week so far. Last night my friends and I all went to Aaron's apartment for an early Thanksgiving dinner. OMG it was fun. I haven't just relaxed and been myself like that in I don't even know how long. It shouldn't take that for me to be myself though. So last night gave me a new goal. Be Me and not worry what anyone else thinks. I mean for Pete's sake, I professed my crush to Aaron. LOL Anyone who knows me knows that, that was out of character. But I'm tired of sitting on the sidelines and just crushing without doing anything. So from now on, that's going to become the norm. I already can't wait until the next time we all get together. It's going to be a blast.

Google

Where are you?

Can someone please just realize what a catch I am! Stop falling in love with my friends and look at me. I want a chance. I promise I'm not always this shy. I'm just a little scared right now. I haven't had to really flirt for like 2 years. I'm really rusty and nervous. I'm really dorky. I don't want to hide that, just find someon that loves it. So where are you??

Phones

Thanksgiving Poem

Late Nights

I haven't been posting much the last few days. Sorry. :(
I've been closing at work and just been taking what time I do have to relax. I can't sleep tonight, too wired on the soda I had at work, so I'm blogging. I honestly don't have too much to say, probably just because it's late though. I remember a time when it was strange for me to post a blog before 11 at night and now it's unusual for me to post this late. lol
I'm looking forward to next week. I kind of just want to skip the weekend (mostly because I'm working pretty much all of it). Monday is going to be awesome. My friends and I are all getting together at Aaron's for an early Thanksgiving dinner. Yay!! We're having ham instead of a turkey but it will all still be good. After all, what's better than food and good friends?

Hello

HELLO WORLD!!
It's going to be a good day!

Hallelujah

I had to search through a ton to get one that had the beginning as this one (the official video didn't even).
So, today's song is....

Hallelujah by Paramore

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3Z_mfljR1s

Friends

I have to once again write about what great friends I have. Last night I was really needing to talk to someone. It was kind of just one of those nights. So I texted Emily and Facebooked Aaron. Between the two of them I was able to get pretty much everything that I wanted to out.
On another note though, how can someone be so blind? Clearly it's an attempted set-up but nope ain't gonna notice that. lol Well, notice it already!

Relapse

I'm really glad I'm working closing shift the next two nights. That won't give me much time for thinking which is exactly what I can't seem to stop doing the last two days. I hate feeling like this. I don't even know why I do all of a sudden. I had been doing well. I guess it's just part of the process though. Can't happen overnight and I suppose there may be a few relapses.
I guess the most important part is to stay positive. :)

Astroid

Being the Smart Kid

I have to say that being the "smart" kid never becomes "cool". I am 20 years old and in college. I always get the highest grade in my Spanish class. Everyone in the class knows that I do. So the people in the class that are my age, ignore me and don't let me in there "group" and the older ones always look at me when the instructor asks a question. It's kind of sad that we can't leave that all back in high school. I feel amazing for having the highest grade but feel unwanted because of it as well. Oh well though. Better to have brains and only a couple of friends than to be failing and be surrounded by friends. At least in my opinion.

Poor Dude

Stood Up and Alone

I wish that you could understand what I'm going through. I wish that you knew just how I felt. You don't though. You don't because we are still yet to talk about it. So, once again I get to spend 5 hours alone at work tomorrow thinking about it all. Letting my head fill up with these stupid thoughts that I can't seem to help. There is so mug that I want to tell you, that I just need to get off of my chest for my sake. When I (if) I finally get the chance to though, will I? Or will it be another time that I just say the stuff that I think won't make you made. If I can't have you in my life the way that I used to then I at least need to still be friends. I don't know what I would do without that. You've been my best friend for 4 years.
It's funny because I really thought that I was doing better. Two nights ago though, I had a dream that made me realize that subconsciously, I'm not. I think I've figured out what I need to get better, I just can't seem to find it. I thought I had, but was quickly proven wrong and was dropped. Then, once more and I realized what a stupid mistake that would be. Lol and now, I may have but it's different this time because I don't know. So if I can't have you then this is what I need.
Now I lay here in bed, once again unable to sleep. Once again, in a sense, being stood up. Once again, alone.

Careless Whisper

Today's song is...

Careless Whisper by Seether :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0_dyc4IrLg

Song Writing

About a year ago, I wrote my first song. I thought it was kind of stupid for me to write more songs though because I have no musical abilities. Thus, I couldn't write the music to go along with it.
Well, that all changed the other day. Before I decided to stop attempting to write songs, I had written about Friday night football. Then I heard the new Kenny Chesney song Boys of Fall. It is strikingly similar (but better than) the one I remember writing in the past.
Anyway, I've started on another song. However, it is still a huge work in progress but at least this way someone can tell me if it's even worth working on more. lol I've kind of hit a rut, but I'll give it the weekend and work on it some more.

She's 21 and living at home
He was stationed on a ship in some foreign lands
Everyone says they'll never make it
Long distance doesn't work, he's going to get lonely
And you won't be there.

But oh no
They ignored all those around them
Toughened up, pulled it together
And dealt with the lonely tears.
People do this all the time, so why can't they?

But they did it
For 12 long months it was trips back and forth
3 months apart at a time
But they did it.

After a while, they started to fail.
She let it all go
She'd been too strong, for too long.
And she cried, and she fought
And she wanted him back her whole heart

She knew he was her one,
But what could she do?
He moved on.
But she couldn't.

(still trying to figure out one more to go here)

She's living at home
And he's moving on.
Everyone tells her she's better off
But she's not, Oh no she's not.

Blue

I'm just feeling kind of blue today. Someone cheer me up please.

Football Wives

I'm watching this show called Football Wives. It's very interesting. They act like there husbands are more like soldiers. Talking about how dangerous and stressful it is. That he goes out and puts his life on the line every week and you just don't know.
Well hell, no you don't know. You don't know if he's going to get hurt and not get another multi-million dollar contract next year. So don't spend it all! Hello, save the money just in case. Instead of buying a huge house, why don't you just live like the soldiers you think your husbands are. Live off of their pay. Then let's see you complain about it not being worth the risk or something.
Ok, vent over. lol. :)

Pledge

Good Times

I've had a good past few days. Hung out with friends, applied for a seasonal job...
I guess though it'd have been hard for a day to be worse than Saturday was. I'm on the upside of it all now though. I'm ready to move forward. See what lies ahead. It could end up being something new or something from my past. I don't care what it is. I of course have my preferences but I'm not going to dwell on that for now. lol
Anyway, I hope the rest of the week keeps up this trend.

Walmart