Initiative

Initiative - The power or ability to begin or to follow through energetically with a plan or task.

A year ago I had plenty of initiative. I was in college, away from home. I wasn't exactly in love with that college but I wasn't going to just give it up. I was in a sorority, which I was also not entirely in love with. No, I didn't have a job but I had tried to find one in the boring town of Jonesboro without much luck. I knew what initiative was. I took it by the horns and showed it who was boss. That was a year ago though.

Fast forward to June. I quit my sorority. It was 100% my choice. I realized that it wasn't for me, I was different from the girl I was when I rushed. Now fast forward to August. I had moved back Jonesboro. I was back at ASU. I had kind of not been wanting to go back to the town thrown in amoungst the corn fields but figured I would give a semester and transfer for the spring semester. Well, that didn't happen. Just 3 days into the semester I realized that if I stayed I would be absolutely miserable. I knew that I wouldn't give 100% to my work and that it would suffer. I don't like to do anything if I'm not going to give it my all. I came home in the middle of that week and withdrew and moved home that Friday.

It was too far into the semester (even though just 3 days) to sign up for any classes at NWACC unless they were late start ones. Well, let me tell you... late start classes at NWACC are classes like basket weaving and swimming. Not at all what I needed. I decided to take the semester off and get a job. I did get a job, after months of searching. It was only seasonal though and I evidently was not the best come the end of the season. Oh well, I had wanted to find a new job anyway. Only I never realized that I would go 5 months without being able to find one. I have no ambition to go to NWACC now (although in my defense I never really wanted to). I had a plan though. Yes, just one plan but a plan nontheless. I'm a planner. I find something to plan about and figure out every possible scenario for that plan. No surprises is my thought. WRONG! What about when the entire plan falls through? What do you do then? I guess that's where I am now. I have to find the initiative (which i have it's just not visible) and find a new plan. I have to suck it up and be an adult.

Until next time